The Hindu : Miscellaneous / Religion : Detachment in family life

Online edition of India's National Newspaper
Tuesday, Nov 23, 2004

Miscellaneous

Miscellaneous - Religion

Detachment in family life

CHENNAI, NOV. 23. It is the belief of many seekers that a spiritual way of life calls for an exclusive approach entirely at odds with the cares and concerns that govern a layman's life. Even the very pious have not been free of such a notion. Priyamvada, son of Swambu Manu, an exemplar of austere life, felt that only by remaining a bachelor could his detachment help him in his spiritual quest. However he was counselled that since man is born to procreate, one could attain the ultimate goal of liberation even within the confines of family life.

Scholars state that the life of a householder with its many checks and balances is more comfortable and safe, for beyond the facade of earthly care and concern it is one's spiritual focus that matters.

To ordinary seekers who react emotionally to every ebb and flow of fortunes, developing the correct frame of mind may appear daunting.

In his discourse Sri Vidyasagara Madhava Theertha said that despite being married Lord Krishna has been eulogised as an eternal Brahmachari. Many may wonder at the seeming discrepancy where the praise is at variance with stated facts. Lord Krishna may have entered into matrimony with the Gopis, but He did not derive any pleasure from the same; rather He married them to impart happiness to them, but being totally devoid of `kama' He neither derived joy nor was He dependent on them in any manner.

When a seeker comprehends the two-fold status of the Lord, the visible and the invisible, doubts over Krishna's status will be clarified. The superficial mind grasps the fact of His marriage, but it is the inner self which should comprehend the invisible Lord who is independent of wishes, aspirations, needs or desires.

The Upanishads state that one who leads a family life with the sole purpose of bearing progeny and refrains from mere carnal satisfaction is in fact leading the life of a bachelor in the true sense of the word. It is neither one's circumstance nor the situation one finds oneself in which are determining factors. So long as man wields control over his senses, he is on the correct spiritual path which needs to be maintained at all times.

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