Bangalore: Changing one's self-image helps, but is not always easy. Many at the top of their professions or heading big companies still suffer from poor self-esteem.

"Many of us treat ourselves badly. We keep telling ourselves, we are too short, too fat, too shy or too slow. We make ourselves to be not good enough or as good as the next person,'' says psychotherapist Sunanda Murthy.

Her clientele include some top businesspersons who want to improve their self-image. She has been able to bring about improvement in them.

What you tell yourself matters a lot, she has found. Some people judge themselves — that they can never succeed or that they canbe successful only to some extent. They have imposed limits on themselves. They are overly critical of themselves, she says. "You can start by identifying the negative perceptions you have about yourself. It may be what is keeping you from speaking out at a meeting or staying alone in a corner at a social gathering. Or saying you cannot learn a new competency at work,'' Dr. Murthy says. The next step is to imagine yourself in such a situation. Imagine you are at a party. Strike a confident and cheerful posture and expression, a friendly voice that attracts others. You can even practise in front of a mirror. Next, you speak about the most embarrassing moment or incident you had in public and how perhaps, it could have been avoided. By now, you have started gaining more confidence and become a bit more confident about yourself at a gathering, she says. "You can do the same thing about speaking out at a conference or taking up additional responsibilities at work. Once you have identified the negative self-images, it becomes easier to let go of them. By now, you have reached the stage of implanting positive images in their place,'' Dr. Murthy says.

This part can be a bit difficult at first because you have to let go of all the negative baggage of the past. You now have to get into the habit of positive self-affirmation. Tell yourself you are good at what you do, you can improve your skills and you are a likeable person, Dr. Murthy says.

Printer friendly page  
Send this article to Friends by E-Mail