The Hindu : Karnataka / Bangalore News : Stay cool to make life less stressful

Online edition of India's National Newspaper
Thursday, Apr 20, 2006

Karnataka

Karnataka - Bangalore

Stay cool to make life less stressful

Special Correspondent

Frustration and anger can affect one's physical and emotional health and confidence level

Bangalore: Dealing with life's common disappointments can leave one drained. Frustration and anger can tell on one's health too.

"Being stuck in a traffic jam, a spouse coming late for a meeting arranged beforehand, being overloaded with work or a job interview not going as well as expected are everyday events, but which become colossal problems when they happen," says psychotherapist Sunanda Murthy.

The way one reacts to such problem affects his or her physical and emotional health and confidence level. There are always different sets of reactions. Imagine you are stuck in traffic that shows no signs of moving even after 15 minutes of horns honking all around.One starts losing his or her temper, curses nobody in particular, feels more stressed and becomes unable to think straight.

Now, just suppose you decide to stay calm enough to think the situation out. Yes, there are other roads you can perhaps take if there is a break in the traffic; roads that may be a bit out of the way but will take you to your destination with less strain than being stuck and wearing yourself out mentally. "These positive outcomes are possible if you stay calm enough to think in a focussed way," says Dr. Murthy.

Another typical situation is a spouse or girlfriend/boyfriend not turning up on time. You can lose your temper, enter into an argument and end up ruining the evening by not even talking to each other. It may take weeks before the relationship can be mended, if at all that happens. Losing your temper has not achieved anything.

If, on the other hand, you remain calm and let your partner explain why he/she was late and accept their apology and say something soothing like "What else can you expect from Bangalore's traffic," everything becomes easier. You may have missed one movie but can always go to another or reschedule that restaurant reservation. The relationship remains intact. Another positive fallout could be that your confidence is boosted. You know you can stay calm in a difficult situation and that you can sustain a relationship through a positive attitude. In short, you can consider yourself a decent human being.

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