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Class still matters in "meritocratic" Britain

Hasan Suroor

The latest casualty of the class divide is Kate Middleton, Prince William's ex-girlfriend.

A POSH accent may no longer be de rigeur for entry into the more rarefied circles of British society — indeed the idea of "poshness" itself has changed with the decline of British aristocracy and the rise of an affluent middle class — but, make no mistake, class snobbery is still very much alive in Britain. It goes by the name of "snobocracy" and, like racism, it bubbles under the surface ready to bare its fangs on the slightest pretext. Don't we all remember how Jade Goody's controversial conduct on Celebrity Big Brother was blamed entirely on her working class origin? And then there is the almost daily spectacle of Deputy Prime Minister John Prescott — a man proud of his proletarian roots — being mocked for everything from his accent to his "crude" behaviour.

But forget Ms. Goody, and Mr. Prescott. The latest casualty of Britain's cruel class divide, if media stories are to be believed, is Kate Middleton, Prince William's girlfriend until a few weeks ago, and — on the face of it — as posh as they come. She comes from the upper crust of British bourgeoisie — the sort of people who have made Chelsea such a fashionably expensive address; and who are likely to turn up their noses at anyone who doesn't do the Ascot-Wimbledon circuit. But, because, she doesn't have "blue blood" running in her veins, she was not regarded as quite the right choice for the Prince. Or so goes the story.

Since the William-Kate split there have been reports suggesting that one of the reasons for the break-up was that the royal family did not regard Ms. Middleton as one of "them." According to these stories, clearly fed by the young Prince's bag-carriers, she was seen as too "ordinary" to fit into the royal family. The prospect of an heir to the throne marrying a girl whose mother, Carole Middleton, was photographed chewing gum at the Prince's passing-out parade at Sandhurst was too horrifying for the Palace even to contemplate.

Linguistic niceties

Worse still, Ms. Carole Middleton was not sufficiently fluent in the linguistic niceties expected of someone with "royal" aspirations. Shockingly, instead of calling a "lavatory" a lavatory, she called it "toilet"; rather than greet the Queen with "pleased to meet you," she would ask "how do you do?"; and instead of saying "pardon", when she wasn't quick enough to get it right, she bluntly asked, "what?"

In Britain, there is a long history of what linguist Alan Ross in the 1950s dubbed "U" and "non-U" usages in his seminal work on how a person's social class was determined by the way they used certain words. Writer Nancy Mitford has, in fact, published a whole glossary of "U" and "non-U" words. All of which confirms the truth of Bernard Shaw's lament in Pygmalion that it is "impossible for an Englishman to open his mouth without making some other Englishman hate or despise him."

So, "Was it `Toiletgate' that done for Kate?" ran a headline in The Daily Telegraph as commentators agonised over how Britain was still a society deeply divided by class. The Independent columnist Sarah Sands pointed out how the "snobocracy" loved to "tease the middle classes by changing the rules the moment we have mastered them, exposing our insecurity." "I remember a friend who suddenly started calling champagne `wine' after he heard it said on a country estate," she wrote.

Coming back to the William-Kate story, it is believed that there were other ways in which the Middletons were made to feel that, for all their new wealth and social status, they were still way down the food chain. (For the record, while Kate's father Michael has a middle-class lineage, her mother comes from a mining family and the couple now run a successful mail order company supplying materials for birthday parties.) Prince William's friends reportedly took cheap pot-shots at Ms. Carole Middleton's previous career as an airline stewardess, and would whisper "doors to manual" when they saw Kate approaching.

To be fair, it must be said that none of this is official and the Palace has been quick to distance itself from stories portraying the royal family as a bunch of stuffy old toffs to whom it matters more how you butter your toast or roll up your napkin than whether you're a genius or an idiot.

Irrespective of whether class had anything to do with the break-up, the current debate shows how it remains an issue in New Labour's "meritocratic" Britain. It has been likened to the "elephant in the room" that everyone recognises but is not able to do anything about. The blogosphere is full of anger about Britain's obsession with class as this entry by Ted Mawson shows:

"As an ex-Brit who's recently become a U.S. citizen, I've reflected on how obsessive the Brits are on the subject of class — and that's on both sides of the divide. ... No one here [in America] looks down on Bill [Gates] because he started making computers in his garage. Toilet, loo, bog? Who cares?"

Meanwhile, here's a tip if you must wish to impress your posh friends: never say "cycle," the correct "u" usage is "bike" or "bicycle"; say "vegetables," not "greens"; it is "scent," not "perfume"; you're "ill in bed," not "sick in bed"; use "spectacles" rather than "glasses"; and avoid "dentures" when you can do with "false teeth"! Got it?

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