THE AHIMSA WAY
A sense of belonging
USHA JESUDASAN
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How would you help someone improve the quality of his/her life?
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Photo: AFP
Reach Out: Bring peace and harmony to your life.
For over a year now, we have been contemplating on “Ahimsa” in this column, and exploring new ways of interpreting this idea in today’s context. When we think of consciously working towards an ahimsa way of living, life offers us ma
ny opportunities not only to be actively non-violent in the traditional sense, but in a creative way too. All of us like the quality of our lives to be positive and full of goodness. Can we think of taking this desire to make the quality of other people’s lives better too?
Make a difference
Research in the University of Toronto defines quality of life “as the degree to which a person enjoys the important possibilities of his/her life. These possibilities result from the opportunities and limitations each person has in his/her life and reflect the interaction of personal and environmental factors. Three major life domains are identified: Being, Belonging, and Becoming.”
I like the idea of ‘Being, Belonging and Becoming’… The denial of these areas is the springboard for much of the violence we experience. Affirming these domains for our families, friends and colleagues can make a huge difference. Take this story. Peter was crippled with leprosy and his quality of life was really low. But he was always looking to make someone else’s life better. One day, he heard screaming next door. The young couple there were fighting again. As their nearest neighbour, Peter was often the peace-maker. Their great sadness was that they had no children.
A few days later, he was cycling home when he accidentally ran over what he thought was a cat. He got down from his cycle, walked over to the bundle, and found, to his dismay, that it was a baby girl. She could not have been more than a week old.
What was he to do with this child? A thought slowly took shape in his mind. A few days ago he had wished that his neighbours had a child. He went straight to his neighbour’s house. The house was unlit and he could hear the woman crying quietly. The woman was surprised to see Peter standing with a baby in his arms. “Here, take her,” said Peter, putting the baby into her arms. “She is your child from now.”
The arrival of that baby changed the young couple. No more sounds of quarrelling and crying. No more slamming doors and dropping pans. Now they had something to live for; someone to love. Love in the form of a baby girl brought peace to their home and to their neighbours.
This story brings into focus the three areas in which we can help others improve their quality of life. First, Peter’s act gave the young couple an opportunity to be what they longed to be. Second, it gave them a sense of belonging in a happy family circle. Finally, it gave them an opportunity to be something other than a warring couple.
Tools
When we look for ways to make the quality of someone’s life better, life gives us “tools”. It could be as simple as a few kind words to a colleague or friend when their sense of identity is fragile. Or drawing him/her into a group and being hospitable. It could be praise and encouragement to enable them reach for something higher in their lives. Very simple words and acts add a new, rich dimension to the quality of all our lives and bring peace and harmony not only to us, but to those around us as well.
If you believe in an ahimsa way of life, and wish to share your story, e-mail ushajesudasan@gmail.com or visit www.ushajesudasan.com
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