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Cupid in Kamdev's land
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On the eve of Valentine's Day meet the Bhatnagars who have made transparency their magic mantra. ANJANA RAJAN takes notes
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Attn: Delhi Metro :: Dr. Hem and Sachidanand Bhatnagar at their home in New Delhi on Friday . Photo: Rajeev_Bhatt (10/02/2006) Digital image D-70
They got married when India had barely celebrated five monsoons as a sovereign independent nation. It was a time when it was easy enough to find women quietly keeping house, staying in purdah, letting the menfolk go out into the hullabaloo of the world. Still, there were others, who made good use of their education and managed admirably on both the home and work fronts.
Hem Bhatnagar, who married S.S. Bhatnagar over five decades ago, was one such person. We can only imagine the young Hem as a bride entering her husband's house in Lucknow in 1952.
But what we see today is a couple that could be called old only in terms of the years they have been on this earth. If you count the fact that they prefer the softer guavas to munch in the mellow sunlight, for the sake of their aging teeth, then, yes, you could say this is an old couple. But get to know their approach to life, and you might say, in contemporary parlance, these dudes make a duo with attitude!
Because they exemplify moving with the times without debunking the values that count; they have practiced being united without trespassing on each other's space. She made a career as a university teacher, he as a journalist, retiring from The Times of India. Even today, she is busy with her cultural organisation Samskar, a women's group Vanita Mandal, and the Saturday Bal Sabhas for children. And if more concrete proof were needed, take the `Valentine's books' created by her and exhibited at the just-concluded World Book Fair in New Delhi.
A country of love
"Western traditions have become entrenched in India anyway," says this retired Principal of Delhi University's Janaki Devi Mahavidyalaya. "Like Valentine's Day. It is like a guest, who, before you can quite open the door, has already made himself comfortable in your house. Anyway, it is a day dedicated to love. Hamara to desh hee pyaar ka hai. (Ours is a country of love)."
So this Hindi scholar came up with handwritten books and cards called "Anang Patrika", reminiscent of lovers in ancient times writing missives on a leaf.
Besides the beautiful Hindi poetry and decorative presentation, this lady has more practical insights on life, and is deeply concerned with the number of people she sees suffering due to fractured relationships. "As for our own 54 years of married life, there are two important elements. One is never hiding anything from each other. What they call transparency in public life! The other thing is complete trust. Because if you allow suspicion to intrude, then the edifice will naturally crumble."
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