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Mom's the best!

The new-age mother shares her thoughts and feelings as she takes on the changing role with perfection, writes Nivedita Ganguly

She manages to juggle a full-time job and homemaking. She rolls out rotis, picks up smelly socks, monitors your homework and also deftly handles the bundles of files and stress at office. Cartwheeling through unconventional routes, she puts a flourishing career on the back burner as soon as the pitter-patter of little feet rudely interrupts the tranquillity of her life.

Welcome to the real world of working mothers. As the world celebrates Mother's Day on Sunday, the new-age mother shares her thoughts and feelings as she takes on the changing role with perfection.

At lunch hour every day, Preeti Mahesh sits with her colleagues, recounting the experiences with her five-year-old son whom she left behind at a crèche for a nine to five job. Frequently answering the cell phone, she keeps a tab of all the mischief of the little one as she continues with her friendly banter.

"I go through never-ending guilt pangs for not being able to spend enough time with my little one. But I have my commitments at work," says Preeti.

Revathy who works as a copywriter in an advertisement firm, too, has to go through nerve-racking moments worrying about her six-year-old daughter at home.

"She keeps complaining that I don't spend time with her. She sometimes says that her friends' parents stay at home more and take out their kids during weekends. That's why I make it a point to sit and speak to her every night after I go back home, so that she feels special and not neglected," she says.

Working moms like Rama feel differently. "Being a working mother helps a lot. I can understand the needs and demands of a challenging career and make my son aware of the problems of the competitive world.

We know how to cope with stress and strike a balance in life and in turn the kids too get a very practical training," she says. Working mothers prove to be a source of inspiration for their kids who emulate their time management and multiple skill management techniques.

Of course, there are a few things that working moms have to sacrifice, she feels. "Like when my seven-year-old son comes back from school, he has loads of things to share about his day's experiences. But by the time I return home in the evening, all the excitement is gone and I can see the disappointed face staring at me," adds Rama.

However, once the children grow up and create their own personal spaces, the children automatically respect and appreciate our decision to have continued our careers, she reasons.

It's never an easy task to meet the expectations of the naughty brats at home and face up a bad day's work. It is a huge investment of resources - emotional, physical and financial.

Keeping up their enthusiasm can be emotionally draining. "The sour mood affects the children who always see just the one side of you," says Ambika who is an architect.

There is always a reason to feel guilty. One more holiday travel you could have arranged for the kids, a grander birthday party you could have organised ... there is no end to it all.

Funny, but nobody seems to talk about stay-at-home dads or harp about father's guilt!

But what can be done to reduce the guilt feeling and strike a balance? Says Ambika, "Not necessarily all housewives are super-moms. In fact, in most cases the kids turn out to be indisciplined and pampered out of control. What really matters is the right dose of love, attention and monitoring," and she continues, "Those stolen moments with your child after a hard day's work seem more valuable at the end of it!"

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