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All for love

RELATIONSHIP To live-in or not... That's the question

Marriage isn't something that everybody is ready for

All this while, I have voiced my thoughts on relationships that are either not working or on how to make them successful. But this time, there's something else to talk about. And this is for those who are in a relationship, which has been working fine for a quite a long time. And who are adult enough to think about the next step.

The thing is, we're in a different generation now, and marriage isn't something that everybody is ready for. So what do we do? We get into a live-in relationship. We find a home and build it around the person we love, it's just that there's no wedding ring.

Now, don't get me wrong. I'm not asking you to get into one if you have a relationship that's working, but at the end of the day, know that it's about whatever makes you happy. And it is something that today's generation is almost completely comfortable with, and in some cases, it is practised as well. But being in a society that still looks down on live-in relationships I've often wondered if it is justified to live with somebody you love and not expect a permanent commitment too soon? What is it that drives people to live with their partner in the name of comfort and love... but not wanting to get married?

The reasons

Now, I'm thinking of the various reasons why one would go in for a live-in relationship as an alternative to marriage. First of all, most people who are in such a relationship would mostly tell you that they want to get married eventually. So why don't they?

Maybe they're trying it out so that they learn the pleasures and problems of married life. Maybe they're just too much in love and want to see each other every second they get, taking advantage of the fact that they're responsible adults and know what they're doing. Or so I'm guessing.

Whatever we think about the issue, it is something that works out for the ones daring enough to try it. Because you learn more about each other this way than you would if you were in a normal `living separately' bond.

But there is a downside to this. What if the relationship turns sour after you start living together? Do you just abandon it and move on? And if you do, do you ignore the way the outside world talks about you? What if your comfort extends, and you find yourself pregnant? Do you move on and call it bad luck if neither of you wants to keep the child? And what if there is abuse? How then do you call it off and return to your family? It is something to think about.

But like I said, at the end of the day, it's what makes you happy. And there's nothing like waking up in the arms of someone you love.

Send in your queries to craigscall@yahoo.co.in

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