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Simply single

Speaking to contributors of "Chasing the Good Life," one learns about the challenges and thrills of being single in the city

THE EDITOR Bhaichand Patel

The title "Chasing the Good Life, on being Single," might assert a stance. But the short stories in this Penguin Viking book portray a more nuanced view. "There's nothing to hide and nothing to flaunt," seems to be the main vein.

Twenty-eight authors contribute to this collection edited by Bhaichand Patel. He explains that "single" simply means living alone. It includes those unmarried, separated, divorced, widowed or simply living apart.

The contributors vary from 26-year-old single woman Mahua Sen to 90-plus widower Khushwant Singh. The majority of the contributors are women. Patel says men were reluctant to write compared to women. Bachelors were willing. But divorced men, though they promised, did not produce.

A contributor, Renuka Narayanan, in "Minority Report", writes on the comfort provided by friends. She wittily describes the dangers of being smart.

Talking about her article, she says, "I actually enjoy being single. It gives me heaps of professional and social freedom. All my girlfriends are very beautiful, very smart and securely married. They're worried that I'm this free flowing particle. But I'm protected by my social halo of being a spiritual writer."

Wider context

Urvashi Butalia is the co-founder of Kali for Women. Her article, "The Wonderfully bearable lightness of being single," studies singleness in the context of the feminist movement. She mentions a survey on single women in the Capital, which found that single women found themselves vulnerable, even suicidal. She moves beyond the personal to tap differences. "While I'm comfortable in my singleness and enjoy it and laugh about it, it's just as well to remember that for others it's not such a desirable state of being," she writes. Discussing singleness she says, "I am my own mistress. But for many other women, it can often imply a lack."

Butalia admits that at first she had reservations about writing for the book. "It's who I am rather than a state. I have my critique of marriage; family can be a source of support and violence. For me, I just didn't have the time for marriage." The stories vary from the facetious to the boastful to the serious. But most are earnest. Humra Quraishi's "Singleton" best explores the trials of terminating a marriage. She writes about the initial anxiety, the solace of work, the challenges of a new home, the pleasant surprises and the dangers of being single. Being a Muslim, she also found ignorance and insults to be dealt with. It is no surprise that Khushwant Singh's "A widower's notes on living alone," is a brazen confession. The opening line says it all. "Right on top in my list of living alone is the freedom to fart without being embarrassed." Singh explains that he took this opportunity to be amusing, to laugh at himself. "You can't take it seriously. And because of that I got the dirtiest chapter in the book!" he whispers with shining eyes. Patel says happily that foreign publishers have shown an interest in the book. "What's happening in the middle class is a revelation. The stigma is not there anymore. With economic freedom, women can look out of a marriage. Thirty years ago, it was different."

"Single, but not alone," is the echo you seem to hear once you shut the book.

NANDINI NAIR

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