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ALL IN THE FAMILY Friends are also part of the sacred circle

The line dividing family and friends is blurred for most youngsters, so that the loyalty that one associated with family is often extended to friends too.

On the other hand, for a few, friends are outside the circle of the sacred family. Yet another lot feel friends are the new family.

Says John Mathew, final year medical student, “We hang out with friends and may disagree with our parents on many issues, but, we love them.”

Adds Aditi Jagadish doing her CA articleship, “Friends are a big part of our lives, a solid support system. But the warmth of our family makes our world secure.”

According to Rani Rajasekharan, a mother, “It is critical and bullying parents who make children rebellious.”

Abhi G., a software professional feels differently. He believes, “Friends are a part of our family. And in the family, one parent often takes up for us and the end result is that things happen our way!”

There is this opposite view too, that friendship often comes with strings attached. There are people who make friends only to take advantage.

In a “use and throw” relationship the gullible get hurt, says Nisha who feels friends should be chosen after much mulling over.

However, for both guys and girls, having the right attitude is a must.

A friendship is a matter of chemistry, about being on the same wavelength and hitting a comfortable zone.

“There are no best friends. Only better friends, each one outdoing the other in friendship,” says Vysakh Nambiar, an engineering student.

While friend Anju says cynically, “It all a farce. Such relationships are generally shallow.”

It is believed that boys retain their friends while girls change them swiftly.

For them friends are like birds of passage. But then generalisations are very often proved wrong.

Shailaja Menon, a college student, believes that only a girl can understand a girl’s feeling and there are many things you cannot share with boys.

But Rose Mary a nutritionist at Talwalkars Health Club says that boys are straight forward and make better confidants than girls.

Iqbal and his wife Yasmin say, “The strain in a relationship begins if we try living our dreams through our children. Let them be the colourful loving, sensitive human beings that they are, after all, they are ours for keeps.”

Another point of discomfort between Gen Now and their parents is the use of slang lingo.

Even if the lingo turns smutty Gen Now girls are perfectly at ease with the jargon.

One wonders whether love exists amidst such friendships. Girls are often sceptical and create a fortress around them.

Most often making the first move is difficult, feel the boys.

Girls on the contrary feel that boys should not take them for granted for they know the ways of the game only too well.

And relationship between the youngsters and parents often range from free and easy, to strict.

Says Hima Joseph, “Imbibing from the social change, parents have become flexible in their ways of thinking and are attuning themselves to their children.”

Gen Now have their feet firmly on the ground and take no chances with love and relationships, and they enjoy life to the hilt.

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