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Ah, children. A woman knows all about her children. She knows about dentist appointments and soccer games and romances and best friends and favourite foods and secret fears and hopes and dreams.

A man is vaguely aware of some short people living in the house.

Men are very confident people. My husband is so confident that when he watches sports on television, he thinks that if he concentrates he can help his team.

If the team is in trouble, he coaches the players from our living room, and if they’re really in trouble, I have to get off the phone in case they call him.

A man riding his Harley was travelling along a California beach, when suddenly the sky clouded above his head and, in a booming voice, the Lord said, “Because you have tried to be faithful to me in all ways, I will grant you one wish.” The biker pulled over and said, “Build a bridge to Hawaii so I can ride over anytime I want.” The Lord said, “Your request is materialistic! Think of the enormous challenges for that kind of undertaking It will nearly exhaust several natural resources. I can do it, but it is hard for me to justify your desire for worldly things. Think of something that could possibly help mankind.” The biker thought about it for a long time. Finally, he said, “Lord, I wish that all men could understand women; I want to know how she feels inside, why she cries, and how I can make a woman truly happy.” The Lord replied, “You want two lanes or four on that bridge?”

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