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Then and now Chandra at her wedding when she was barely 16-years-old

“Williamsburg Experiment” was about ‘art, money and value’ – an enquiry into the poverty of artists. She asks, “It was about why we artists get into this when there are so many hardships? Why do we produce valuable work, without it being valued?” The movie explored the negotiations made between artists, their works and the buyers.

While on the other hand, “The Gift” was a “10-minute fiction film about ‘risky living’. It was about a world minus the economy of exchange – where people live without expectations.”

But her latest film, “Remembrance of Things Present”, is an 80-minute autobiographical enquiry into her own personal reality. The film talks of her arranged marriage when she was barely 16. Even in a metropolis like Bangalore, where girls from middle-class families are educated, the horrors of patriarchy looms larger than ever.

“People told me that I had an interesting story to tell so in a year I decided to make a film on it. It was a story worth telling.” Earlier, Chandra was embarrassed and ashamed of her past — she was wary of pitying looks. But in a few months, she packed her bags and came to the place she left behind 12 years ago.

“It seems almost mythical — coming back after so long. I didn’t even recognize my own daughter, Smriti, at the airport.” She returned to India after such a long gap because it took her 12 years to settle down and be secure about her life.

“For me, the film was about coming out of poverty — not about therapy. It was about coming to terms with my past.” It is not like Chandra has made peace with the injustice done to her. “I still continue to be angry about it, I still think about it.”

For her, it wasn’t about getting rid of a burden; it was about empowering other women.

Interestingly, Chandra’s parents liked the movie. “My mother even showed it to her friends and relatives. Their lives have been historicised.” She adds, “They admit to some faults. They are happy that I am happy and so they just want to carry on with life.”

Smriti Gargi, Chandra’s daughter who was born when she was 17 was largely the reason she left India after 12 years of marriage.

“I felt I had to leave the country to pursue my dreams and Smriti and my brother were the most encouraging.”

She continues, “Otherwise, Smriti would have continued to bear the burden with my imprisonment. I could not be an unhappy mother. Moreover, if I was going to make compromises as a mother, then I was teaching her that it is the done thing to make compromises in life for the sake of others.”

“It was very clear from childhood in the way my brother and I were treated differently. It was pronounced that the house would go to him and that whatever gifts were given to me, I was told to thank him because he parted with them. Middle-class aspirations are contradictory — they talk about freedom, but still want to control their women’s sexuality.”

Chandra feels that women are controlled to suit male desire and hopes that that will change with education.

While Chandra found her freedom abroad, there are still many young women who are married to men working in foreign countries.

“Even though they have left India, India still very much exists for them. It is all just a state of the mind.” Chandra’s second marriage was something that her parents could never accept. They still deemed her married to her first husband, a man eleven years her senior who she divorced while she was in New York.

“I got married again primarily to challenge their beliefs that I was still married to him.”

“Remembrance of Things Present” is a film that explores the existence of child marriage in an urban, middle-class context through dialogues with Chandra’s family, ex-husband, relatives and daughter. She can be contacted at abulafi@hotmail.com

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