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ON THE BRINK Some women are just wired to cry when they’re upset

This was a “grab” moment for columnists and commentators - especially since Clinton won the primary, upsetting expert calculations and exit polls. “Political meltdown” ran a headline. Comments included, “She faked tears to appear more human.” There were wisecracks: “That crying really seemed genuine. I’ll bet she spent hours thinking about it beforehand.”

Then advice: “Crying doesn’t usually work in campaigns. Only in relationships.” Half the world will believe it was a stunt. The other half will wonder how a woman who claims she is ready to lead, is tough, experienced, etc. will deal with, say, a major terrorist attack if facing defeat in a primary puts her on the edge.”

So crying is a stunt. Drops are the most effective weapons in a woman’s arsenal. Women use tears for emotional blackmail. Weeping is convenient. Proves the “weak sex” image. Women break down at the prospect of losing, they play the female victim. They can’t help it, it’s part of their chemical make-up.

You know, I nearly drowned once, like Alice in Wonderland. Only they shouldn’t use it too often, remember the “Wolf! Wolf” story? It’s a calculated attempt to look less calculating and cold. Ha, ha!

“Of course,” said Ranvir Shah of Prakriti Foundation, laughing, “from my daughter to wife to my mother to Hillary Clinton, women use tears as a negotiating instrument. For them it’s a tactic, a clever manipulative device. Please quote me. If women want to bash me up for saying this, it’s fine.”

Comedian Vivek is categorical. “Crying is their biggest weapon,” he said. “Women have used it since Kaikeyi’s times. Men who fearlessly field swords (kaththi) surrender in front of tears (kannir). The training ground for this artillery is the TV serial. After all, the strength of the weaker sex is the weakness of the stronger sex towards them.” His next comedy track could well be on women and tears.

SMILE’s director Paramasivam, however, gives crying a kinder look. Mischievous, he dubs the manipulation theory. Women are naturally emotional, he says, they need to be so to show affection. It’s an aspect of the feminine gender. His logic: “Why would they snivel and sob to stage-manage things when it fools no one?”

It doesn’t? Sushma Veeramani, Math Lecturer at Madras University agrees with him. Some women are just wired to cry when they’re upset, she feels. It’s natural. No, it isn’t to achieve something. Women’s trump card, suggests counsellor Mohana Narayanan.

End of discussion. When you’ve exhausted all logical arguments, you know when you’re licked, you realise postponing won’t resolve the problem, you simply tap into that salty support. “It’s the last resort, born out of frustration.” It’s an analysis unlikely to win her girl friends. But Mohana adds, “Men do it too!”

The arguments may never end. “We don’t want anyone’s sympathy!” said a woman activist. “I’m just sensitive. I fight back tears, I don’t want to look helpless! Hey, this is how I de-stress.” It’s a genuine tactic to force communication, said another, because “guys are taught to keep emotions in, deny it, or better still, watch cricket and read the paper.” It’s a get-by-any-means tool that shouldn’t be tolerated, say the guys. “If you fall for it, you have no one to blame but yourself.”

Everyone knows the motive behind the mini falls, it’s a difficult act to pull off. Here, use the box of tissues, that’s about all that you are getting. So, by getting teary-eyed, did Hillary Clinton make a “connection” with the voters? Is that why she was propelled to a 3-point victory over the favourite? Judgments, judgments. Enough to make you cry, really.

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