A mother-in-law decides to find out how much her sons-in-law love her. The next day, while strolling along the river with her first son-in-law, she lets herself fall into the water and starts to drown. At once, the son-in-law jumps into the river and
saves her. The next day, in front of his house, he finds a brand new bike, with a little thank you note signed by the mother-in-law. She tries the same with her second son-in-law too, who saves her and receives a new bike. The mother-in-law then goes out with the third son-in-law, falls into the water and begins to drown. However, he lets her drown. The next morning he finds an expensive new car in front of his house — with a little thank you note signed by the father-in-law!
Two mothers meet for coffee one morning, and the conversation turns to their children. “How are your kids?” one woman asks her friend. The friend says: “My son has married a lazy woman. She doesn’t get out of bed until 11. She
’s out all day spending his money, and when he gets home, she makes him take her out to dinner at an expensive restaurant.”
The woman asks her friend how her daughter is. The friend replies: “Oh, she’s married a saint! He brings her breakfast in bed, gives her enough money to buy all she needs, and takes her out for dinner every night, at a fancy restaurant.”
A mild-mannered man is tired of his wife always bossing him, and so decides to go to a psychiatrist. The psychiatrist gives him a booklet on being assertive. He reads it on the way home. When he walks through the door, his wife comes to greet him.
He tells her: “From now on, I’m the man of this home, and my word is law. When I come home from work, I want dinner on the table. Now, get upstairs and lay out some clothes on the bed, because I’m going out with the guys tonight. Then draw my bath. When I get out of the tub, guess who’s going to dress me and comb my hair?”
Replied the wife: “The undertaker.”
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