'Parenting has become a challenge'

By Our Staff Reporter

THRISSUR, OCT. 14. Child rearing in a normal way has become an extremely challenging and complex task in the fast-changing contemporary society, according to Dr. Shobha Srinath of NIMHANS, Bangalore.

"In the contemporary society you cannot afford to think that the child will grow just like that unlike in the past. Parents have to put in hard work for child rearing now. For this the parents will have to have a deep insight into both the child's nature, and their own nature," Dr. Shobha, who was here to attend the South Zone conference of the Indian Psychiatric Society, told The Hindu.

In the past, the children could have the company of the numerous people within the family and could go to the neighbours' place for interactions. There was a lot of physical activity then when the children used to climb tree, run around and engage in collective plays that involve lot of body movements.

Now the child has far too many mental distractions like the TV, video and going for movies. Most of the children are growing up in nuclear families where both the parents are working and have very little time to spend with the child. Also, there is tremendous pressure on the child because of the competitive atmosphere in society. The children want to learn lot of things, but in such a situation they are not able to learn them in an interpersonal context.

Therefore, the child thinks that the happiest way to escape from the stresses and hassles of day to day life is to seek refuge in the TV. Even when the parents spent time with the child, it is in a supervisory or advisory mode, which again makes the child disturbed.

More than the length of the time that we spent with the child it is the quality of the time that is important. The children must feel that the parents enjoy spending time with them even if they are not the first in the class. What is the point in making your child an IAS officer if he or she is not contended person, and curses the parents throughout the life?.

The responsibility of caring the children which is a highly demanding task should be shared by both the parents. If one of the parents is absent, it will be a stressful task on the other and only people with high level of mental and physical health will be able to successfully perform it.

The four ingredients of good parenting are nurturing, protecting, disciplining and ensuring good communication. In the Indian context, the parents are either strong disciplinarians or over-protective. In most of the cases they are seen less capable of developing healthy communication with the children.

The parents should realise that the child is an individual in his or her own right with specific natures, and the strategy of parenting should be devised by taking into account of this natural traits.

Hyperactivity

Dr. Shobha said one to two per cent of the school children were found to be suffering from the Attention Deficit Hyperactivity Disorder (ADHD) which gets manifested in the children in the form of inability to concentrate on any things for a reasonable period. Children affected by this disorder can be seen to be fidgety and picking up frequent quarrels with peers in the class rooms.

In the case of ADHD, all the three symptoms, hyperactivity, distractibility and impulsiveness should be found together at significant level for a long period, causing disability which means the child is not able to perform at levels expected of him or her. Also, the symptoms should be all-pervasive, they could be detected at all places including home, class rooms, and in peer groups.

The children with this disability can be seen to be having social interaction problems and may find themselves ostracised from all kinds of companies. Eventually this will lead to reduction in their self-esteem. There can be some co-occurring problems like specific learning disabilities among such children.

Emphasising that this disorder is mainly a biological problem triggered off by the changes in the neuro-chemistry in the brain, Dr. Shobha said this can be caused by birth trauma, environmental factors and toxic elements.

Treatment of this disorder will be a long drawn out process and it is important to isolate it from other forms of mental problems. If treated with the help of experts it can be corrected to a great extent. Recently drugs have been made available for improving the concentration of the children affected with such disorders in certain select outlets, but they should be used judiciously and strictly under medical supervision.

Nearly 50 per cent of the children with this disorder are found to be suffering from its symptoms in the adolescence and adulthood while 25 to 40 per cent were found to be developing delinquent behaviour and substance (alcohol and drug) abuse, if not followed up with proper treatment.

The paper presented by Dr. Shobha along with Dr. Sathish Girimaji of NIMHANS at the Psychiatric Society conference also discussed the methods to be used for treating the children with extreme obstinacy and other forms of oppositional behaviours using simple behavioural techniques.

About 400 psychiatrists from all the four South Indian States are attending the conference.

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